i’ve been missing…
April 3rd, 2004
…painting and feeling a bit sorry for myself. I watched Love Actually with N yesterday and felt very jealous of Andrew Lincoln’s studio. Made me briefly reconsider my plans for my own. For a while I saw myself in there painting large paintings, organising storage space for them. Teaching again. Running ahead of myself again. It felt good while it lasted. I’m not ready. I do wonder if I will be again and that has made me sad. The small drawings I’ve been making suddenly felt very second best. The thought of my plans for my comfortable studio felt like the conciliation prize.
N has managed to cheer me up a little with a new book. I do really like the illustrations. They’ve reminded me that I can get excited about things smaller than four foot square canvases. That does feel better.
April 3rd, 2004 at 9:51 pm
Ijust wanted to let you know that whenever I need a lift, I always check your site. Your gentle humor and whimsical drawings always make me smile. I hope you are feeling better and continue to improve.
April 5th, 2004 at 12:00 am
I’m sorry you seem to be stuck in the bit too. It’s no fun being held back is it? Don’t worry though we shall prevail!
April 5th, 2004 at 10:24 am
~~~~~ waving
remember nothing is for ever - you can take a sabattical from painting and if you want to go back to it in a few months thats ok.
April 6th, 2004 at 8:33 am
What a lovely bunch of comments thank you. M, I am going to start to think of myself on a sabatical I think. I know I do have a problem with thinking very far beyond how things are now - imagining that they can very really be different. I’m going to try. In the meantime, it’s nice to know Loretta that what I’m doing here make you smile - that does cheer me up.
Wendy - thank you. I shall keep plodding along as best I can. I suspect that is prevailing in a way don’t you?