spending…
January 26th, 2005
…a lot of time in in my studio staring at my light-fittings. Actually I’ve been doing a lot too.
It’s very strange, I always thought that rushing and doing was the way of avoiding feelings and pushing things away. Now I’ve found that moving slowly through my day, doing little bits of this and that, planning small treats and what to do next is actually a very good way of getting through these difficult days.
I’m not sleeping for much more than six hours at the moment so unless I want to wake up in the miserable pre-dawn I need to keep myself awake at the very least until midnight and 2.00 am is much better. However there is only so much cleaning, tidying and emptying and filling of the dishwasher I can do. The television isn’t offering much comfort and I do find I don’t want to listen to much of my music just now. I’ve needed something new that feels neutral. The BBC radio website has come swooping in to my rescue. I shall never complain about my license fee. BBC Radio 4 and BBC7 both archive their programmes. I can gently head off to sleep listening to a play, have a book read to me or educate myself about something obscure. I’m so grateful. Last night it was a Wilkie Collins, before that some Sherlock Holmes.
I’m off to search for something for tonight…
January 26th, 2005 at 10:05 am
Hi! I am listening to the radio on the internet as well, packing for a move to a new place. Especially happy with the archives with radio programs from the 40´s and 50’s.I also recognize falling to sleep with some book read aloud, or some strange play mumbling in the background, the perfect way to win over lack of sleep… Take care!
January 26th, 2005 at 10:47 am
after a night where I felt I slept 10 mins every hour at most - I feel for you Michael. Mine was tempoary stressed before big event nerves so I know it will pass.
I have a yen for comforting reading at these times particularly dectective fiction - new find Donna Leon
January 26th, 2005 at 12:19 pm
I recently discovered BBC7 too. I mean, I knew it was around but I’d never bothered to see what is really being offered. I love it! I just love listening to plays and books being read aloud. It’s so comforting, isn’t it?
Oh: and I see you’re reading “In Praise of Slow”. Did you hear it read on BBC Radio 4? It was great and then I checked it out of the library and really enjoyed that too. I really do love slowing down… just could do without the pain!
January 26th, 2005 at 1:00 pm
I’m glad you seem to be finding a way through your muddle. Relationship stuff is very hard and stressful and something nobody needs really — though if you have any sort of health problem it becomes even harder. The sorting and tidying will be therapeutic but trying to manage that kind of activity with the stress of the emotional stuff will be draining so take care. I understand the need for RR now and just hope the troubles in the relationship weren’t to do with the health problems.
I love Radio 7 too — been reacquainting myself with old 50s and 60s stuff as well as plays and also got myself a ‘Round the Horne’ tape (which I’d heard on R7 over Xmas)to listen to in the car. What strikes me is how ’saucy’ some of it is and how they got away with it back then. I’m sure my Mum didnt know what she was laughing atover the traditional roast on Sundays in 1965. The gravy would’ve curdled if she had !!